Friday, February 02, 2007

what a change a year make


this would be my first entry for this year, 2007 and it's february already. time flies, really quickly and i find it hard to catch up sometimes. yesterday i was on the phone to my parents when i found out that yesterday was thursday instead of wednesday which i thought it was all day long. i felt like i lost a day and as the big day approaching fast every morning i wake up with palpitation. it isn't an exaggeration i swear to god.

so for the past few weeks i have been a nocturnal creature. i didn't know how it happen and how it started but no matter what my eyes are wide awake at 3 am every morning and usually the lids begin to feel heavier at 6 am and maybe at 7 i would be sailing in deep REM sleep. tonight wasn't an exception and since my brain couldn't stand at the sight of Henderson-Hasselbach equation for acid base balance i figured why not, lets do something with this dying site. that's the thing, i'm beginning to think that aging actually started to take its toll on me. it was so frustrating that it takes longer for me to understand stuff i've learnt before not too distant past ago and even then to retain new memories which was like a second nature to me when i was young-er feel like such an effort and that isn't guaranteed to stick in my tiny brain a few hours later. what's up with that! i know this might sound a bit bad but i hope my friends out there especially those who were part of this blog share the same predicament, don't wanna be the odd one out, hahahahaha. it's not a "bit" bad, that actually is terrible and appaling. can't believe i said that.

the other day i was just thinking this time last year, i spent most of time in Cork. those good old days. chilling out just having fun with those crowd. i did enjoy it very much. but today it is a complete reversal of situation. it is completely different and empty. as most of the guys over there scattered all over the world now finding their ways in life. things are not like it used to be. i know that we shouldn't dwell in the past but you can't help missing those moments. where laughter were the essence of our congregation, in the expense of a few of our friends' miseries of course and they liked it anyway. i'm kidding. you know what i mean. if you ask everyone or yourself i'm sure there are no happy days like it was before, sure there are plenty happier days but somehow not quite like they were used to be. maybe i'm the only one who feel this way coz admittedly my life here sucks and god knows how desperately i wish i was home right now.

hmmm nothing on tv at this hour, no new news on the news channels, there were teleshopping shows in most of music and cartoon channels. never thought having full sky package with more than 100 channels can feel like a waste. the most annoying thing is i still don't feel sleepy!!! god maybe i should try some temazepam or something.