selamat hari raya

hari raya kali ini berbeza, agak sunyi , tapi tetap meriah, already certain people dah balik, soon we will be missing even more..........

selamat hari raya maaf zahir batin!

our son...

Kamil Jakub Franta

weih , sakit hatilah aku!

Okay now i have to acknowledge that certain people are just thick!!!!!!! LIKE SUPER THICK!!!!

forgive me for my language, but eeee, geream nyerlah AKU

aku call since friday okay

imagine, dalah aku tak tido satu malam ( friday night) despite having the 4 hour protected sleep thing, sbb patient byk sakit

ader hati nak call aku semalam ( sat night/sunday morning) - pukul 3.30am just nak inform aku yg patient potassium 4!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, LIKE 4 PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

4! empat ! THE POTASSIUM WAS 4 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

IT WHEN LIKE THIS:

BLEEP 2147

HELLO SIOC, MAS HERE

Gud morning Dr, i just wanna inform u so and so patients K is 4, u wanna chart fluids?

ME, isnt he on 10 hrly

yup he is, ohh just for the morning, so that we dun have to call u

i hanged up at that stage

YA ALLLAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ABUSE NYER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! EHHHHH BENCILAH AKU DENGAN PUKI PUKI tuh, venci!!!!!!!!!!!!!

skop keje

Aku sooooo tak sangke dah dekat sebulanlah aku keje, lame jugaklah for a very leisurely person like me. Anyway, skop keje aku sangatlah ‘complicated dan mencabar’ sekali, al maklumlah surgical intern. Berikut adalah skop keje aku hamper tiap tiap hari:

1. chart fluids
2. chart fluids
3. kene bleep dgn nurse sbb tak chart lagi fluids
4. barulah chart fluids
5. chart pain analgesia
6. chart analgesia
7. chart anti emetics
8. kene bleep dgn nurse sbb tak chart lagi analgesia
9. rechart drug kardex
10. rechart drug kardex
11. talipon microbiologist
12. menyundal sekejap kat dr.'s rest
    
13. order xray
14. order ct
15. order MRI
16. mintak report xray,ct, MRI ASAP from radiologist
17. tunggu kat depan pintu radiologist at 1pm nak mintak report
18. 2pm – radiologist tak bukak pintu lg , walaupun dah sejam tunggu dpn pintu dia and siap ketuk lagi, putus asa, try 4pm
19. 4pm- tunggu depan pintu radiologist nak mintak report for evening ward round
20. 4.30pm radiologist ditemui, kene soal dgn radiologist abt patient, belambak question disuruh jawab, di suruh define maksud ‘acute abdomen’-baru buleh dpt verbal report ‘ cibai puki punyer radiologist
21. IV line
22. IV line
23. IV line
24. PR exam, PR exam
25. frustrated tak dpt masuk IV line
26. IV line
27. fax letter to Dublin
28. mintak transfer patient to Dublin
29. fast track letter to dublin
30. discharge patient
31. ECG, ECG , ECG
32. admit patient
33. gaduh dengan secretary 1D ( OMG!!! SHE such a BITCH) sebab rebut compiter nak print lab patient
34. consult letter
35. consult letter
36. talipon reg team yg lain utk verify consult tersebut
37. kene marah dgn reg team yg lain sbb tak tahu pasal patient, tapi memandai nak mintak consult
38. word round evening- refer to1,2,5,6,12,13,14,24,28
39. lepas segala kat atas tuh siap, baru buleh balik umah- kalau tidak tak bule balik umah, uwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!

Anyway , as I said keje aku sangatlah mencabar, sepatutnyer aku amik jer course secretary kat cosmopoint tuh, barulah effektif sikit keje aku, anyway, having said that aku bersyukur jer sbb dpat keje. Majority time keje aku terlibat dengan talipon , so aderlah dalam 2 jam tiap tiap ari aku tercongok kat talipon 1C , menalipon orang

BAik aku bagi example :

2 days ago nie, patient masuk sbb exec of pilonidal sinus

So kene admit masuk ward, entah kenape, private patient kot

Anyways lepas surgery, mr Waldron suruh bagi mamat tuh augmentin, dressing, zydol, and a DEPILATION CREAM, sebab mamat nie banyak bulu kat bontot ( mmg banyaklah , sebab aku yang buat examination)

Reg pulak tak tau aper DEPILATION CREAM tuh, he said bende tuh ader jerk at dalam BNF.

This was at 530pm, mamat tuh dah tunggu 4 jam utk di d/c

Anyway, so lepas tuh terkontangkantingla aku mengkaji BNF cari hair removal cream

Siap 2 orang nurse lagi tolong aku , bukak MIMS, sebab kesian patient tengah tunggu nak di D/c

Anyway, so tak jumpe la kat dlm BNF

So talipon pharmacy regional, tp tutup

So aku tekan butang magik 9, sambung ke switch, then to the nearest known open pharmacy, dptlah o’sullivans kat Bandar

Aderlah depat 15 mins aku bincang dgn dia pasal cream nak buat bulu bontot org !!!

Takder penghabisan

Then aku d/c dulu patient, aku ckp nanti aku talipon dia

Next day aku taliponlah pharmacy regional, ckp dgn pharmacy for a suitable hari removal cream for the buttocks

Mau at this stage, nurse nurse and porter porter disekeliling aku ketika itu dah ketawa

Si Pharmacist tuh pon siap ketawa

Siap ckp is this a joke lagi - can U imagine perasaan aku time nie, penat penat aku talipon sane sinie, dia ingat joke, U BITCH!

Aku pon serius lah berckp, menerangkan keadaan sebenar

So pharmacist tuh pon serius

Siap tanye aku sepecifically where the abcess was

On the buttock cheeks , or on the natal cleft

So dia suggest guna VEET ( yang ader kat dlm TV tuh)

Veet for sensitive skin

Pharmacist tanyer aku tau gune ke?? I was like fuck u bitch aku mane gune hair removal cream dlm hati

So then aku bincang dgn nurse cam na nak gune veet nie, nurse siap bagi tips tips lagi for the best way to do it ( aku siap buat short notes lagi), siap cerita experience dia buat bikini wax lagi segala

So then talipon patient , explain how to use veet-

CAN U IMAGINE PEOPLE?? THINGS I DO FOR MY PATIENTS!!!!!??!! AND THINGS I HAVE TO DO??!!!

HAIR REMOVAL CREAM For THE BUTTOCKS!!!!!!

Pathetic la jugak kan!!!!!!!!!

Anyway, nanti aku cerita ceriti lagi skop keje aku YANG LUAS TUH!!!!

sorrrrrrrrrrrrrrry people

salam

okay okay , i know you people mesti totally like pissed with me sebab tak hapdate bende nie like almost a year. I so apologize for not hapdating it, bukan aku tak mau, cume tak der mase jer. Well anyway , as predicted by paan, aku keje now at MWRH, limerick , stab city, banyak giler togher, langsung tak posh, soooooo not manhattan, like totally kampung, penuh dgn makcik2 obes-gallstoned like body habitus, yang busuk serta demanding. Padahal patient non-private, belagak macam private!!! WHAT U think u in great portland streeet hospital in london ka?? ( victoria beckham beranak here), WAT , u think u in manhataan ka???. AND WHAT u think u masuk hospital untuk bercuti ka? padahal bontot bersinus, yang discharging, and then kerek kerek nak cerita pasal holiday depa kat las palmas ( WEIH RIMAS LAH!!!) , then buat hal nak mintak bilik private!!!!. AND YA, dun let me start about those NURSES, perkataan nurses says it all. BEING THE SELF CONFESSED TWO FACED BITCH I AM, stakat nie my hubungan AKU dgn depa baik, bolehlah nak cerita pasal coronation streeet watever, tapi tgk muka depa pon kenkadang aku tak tahan. First few days was really like super CUAK, siap needlestick injurylagi segala, u guys can imagine how the blood was drained out of my sistem in just a few seconds, cam nak pengsan jer aku.

Anyway i DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO so miss my student days, i DOOOOO miss the days when i cud go to sri house cam tuh jer, without having to think of work, i DOOOOO misss all you people!!!!! LIKE SUPEr SUPER SUPER MISSSS U PEOPLE.! walaupun limerik is my home for the next 6 months, i still find it foreign ( biaserlah, aku nie kan posh sket, tak biaserlah dgn bandar yang togher nie walaupun aku duduk di sebuah rumah besar yang selesa dengan 3 bilik ( wakakakakaka, matilah kene tembak dgn uncle), i still miss cork. ANway, kepada yang berada di cork, limerik, sligo, dublin, jemputlah datang rumah iyer ( matilah kene kejong dgn kak toh).

wokey people, iALLAH i have time i update sumore, nak tido now, esok wardround kul 7pagi, uwaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!

hello ireland! :-)

phew......you have no idea how long it took me to log in just to write a few lines in here, considering how long i have been on hiatus. geez luckily i am not a superstitious kinda person otherwise i would have abandoned this entry altogether. well i know, i know, it has been a while and to those who were wondering what has happened to me for all this time let's just say i'm still figuring out my way through this little journey called life.

it's been more than 3 months i'd say since i left Ireland. the land i called home for more than a decade long. to come back at last to my home of my future. it hasn't been an easy ride i gotta say since i set my feet on malaysian ground. of course it made me wonder if leaving Ireland was in fact the right move for me nevertheless i am here and the only thing that left for me to do is just deal with it and make the most of what i have in hand. it made my life a little bit more exciting though. i'm talking about everything. life here is not at all as i expected in every single aspect i could think of. everything is different, the weather, the people, the culture and the most of all the responsibilities. the moment i got home i noticed my responsibilities on my shoulders like a huge rock suddenly fell from the sky with a vengeance i may add for my long period of absence. not necessarily a burden, it depends on how you look at it. at times i can't help but secretly wish that i was back in Ireland. never thought i would see the day i utter those words nevertheless that exactly how i felt in fact still am feeling that way sometimes especially when on the road!.

regret? nah not at all. coming back was just the next step in the game of my life. sooner or later i have to face it. do i miss Ireland? the question that seems quite popular among people here. hmmmmmmmmm............yes, i miss it a lot! you never know what you get till it's gone fellas! that's human nature. of course i do miss it a lot. the customs, the cultures, the weather ( can't you believe it, i miss irish weather!!! it's true), most importantly my friends who have been my family away from home. the laughter, the weekends, the picnics, rollerblading, all those things that we did together i cherish them till the day i die and oh yeah those little kids especially peq no', nattie, aquila and the bee and jesus, how i miss them all!. like it or not things won't be the same anymore no matter how badly we try and hope for them to be like they were. you will know once you guys are back , we will be close and yet it will feel so far away from each other and as a heads up, we definitely lead our own separate lives here! we can't help it but i hope we will still be close in this virtual world. :-)

Still Nadia

Cork University Maternity Hospital .... FINALLY!

Well, amazingly, I have time to jenguk2 blog ni dgn harapan ada a highly anticipated post from DR Mas Irfan Jaya Mahmooth (please excuse the possible wrong spelling, ya) or from Encik Paan kita yg senyap sunyi (kalau tidak kaulah penyelamat/pengaktif blog ni, Paan), tapi tiap2 kali masih muka anak aku yg aku nampak. Still Nadia, tapi takpalah, aku pun suka tgk muka anak aku hihihi. Anyways, a mighty congratulations to Mas, use this month to enjoy and relax/holiday with family, becoz, YOU WILL NOT GET IT AGAIN ONCE YOU WORK!

Pengunjung setia Nadia di CUMH (everyday without fail)

Nadia making sure daddy got a lot of practice... (a lot!)


Five days old

Daddy thought me Silat from a very young age...

' I believe I can fly...'

Six weeks young.....Snoozing with Teddy Zzzzz

Nadia

Asslamualaikum,

hihihi, today is Day 12 post caeserean section to enable our beloved little Nadia to be born. Thank you everybody for your best wishes, much appreciated. It started with irregular but intense pain, then after ARM, I flew from 3 to 7 cm in 3 hours, THEN, stuck at 7 cm for seven hours. CTG became non reasuring, but fetal blood sampling was entirely normal. If I wasnt one of the 'pundits' in the labour ward, I would have been sectioned 3 hours earlier, but we wanted to give a good try. It seems that I might have what they call a 'true cephalo-pelvic disproportion'.

The main thing is, Syukur Alhamdulillah, Nadia is born at 23:40 on 15th April 2007, kicking and alive at 2620g and a mop of black hair on her head. On her 4th day she is at 2860g and the 8th day at 3000g. We registered her as NADIA SHASMEEN MOHD SHAHRULNIZAM. So Shaz, kau bolehlah berbangga sebab ada unsur2 nama kau hihihi (to Farhan and Mas, this is quite unintentional ok).

I must say that the proud father is completely bessoted with her, and why not right. Mum is too! Sekarang ni aku dlm pantanglah, tapi best jugak, received great meals to my room at least 3 times a day, daily massage and bertungku..... aahhh best. Cuma the healing of caeserean delivery will be timely, but insyallah Im getting there. Doakanlah kami semua sihat sejahtera.

More pics at moshsiti.blogspot.com

Congratulations CTMOSH!

Just wanna wish CTMOSH tahniah for the arrival of your precious baby girl...May she grow up to be a GREAT PERSON...beautiful, charismatic, intelligent, caring, generous... like her mummy. Wise, resourceful, patient... like her daddy... InsyaAllah..

Loads of hugs and kisses from Uncle Syaz!!

p/s- dah confirm ke nama baby?
- cepat2 ye letak gambar baby kat sini ye MOSH...

Just something I ventured recently...

Assalamualaikum everybody...

Here I am, sitting in my room, bored to death...it's scorching hot outside, a bit windy though...thank god. Tried to take a nap earlier, but couldn't rest my mind (well, my mind had always been restless though, god knows for how long!). So, let me just jot down a little something for you guys to read.

(pic left-minah ni name dia Soo. baik dan rajin sangat tapi garang jugak. Banyak betul dia buat keje)
(pic-khairil, me and chia-three of us with the same foster family)


I recently went to Bachok (3rd April) for what they call Community and Family Case Study (CFCS). There were 18 of us. I was the group leader. We stayed in the kampung for 5 days with foster families. Just to let u guys know, Bachok is called 'Jelapang Tembakau Negara' (Mas, u surely knew this already right?).Wow...there were indeed acres of tobacco plantation. They looked like huge, overgrown Pak Choi leaves. 80% of the villagers here plant tobacco leaves for a living (not in Mukim Nipah though). Most of them only work 4-5 months a year during the tobacco season. In that duration, they scrapped enough money to support them for a year! It's kind of a tradition there to plant tobacco. But, mind you, there are quite a few large houses there from well off families (contributed by their professional kids who does not plant tobacco..)


Many doctors live in this Bachok area. Why? Most of them worked either in private clinics or HUSM which is just 20 mins drive. But, most of all, they lived there because of the beaches. There was this huge seaside mansion owned by a couple, the husband is a Prof. Hans (is it German?) married to a Malaysian dr. (Malay muslim). Kinda reminded me of dear Leia and Honza. Wow! Their house was like living in an expensive holiday mansion everyday.

Back to CFCS. Actually, all 220 year 2 med and dental students went to Bachok district which comprise of a few mukim. My group of 18 were assigned Mukim Nipah which has around 1000 houses. We conducted cross-sectional study. We tagged all the houses in the whole mukim in 1 and a half days. Then we randomly selected 120 houses for our survey. We interviewed about 500 people. Took measurements and everything. Paan would definitely enjoy that part (if you know what I mean...)haha! I was so tired from the ordeal of being a leader. I'm not made for that kind of stuff, really. Am not really a leader. But anyway, it was quite a success. Everybody co-operated and did their jobs well which was a relief.
(pic- that's me - tagging and mapping on day 1)

Aduh!!!Se'eh nye perut aku! My tummy was bloated everyday, all the time in the kampung. Why? Because these Kelantanese people liked it a little bit too much to stuff their guess of honour with food. My foster family prepared food for me like there were no tomorrow! And we have to eat at the other foster families too. And all the houses that we went in for surveyed prepared at least super-sweet drinks and super-sweet kuih for us. It would be rude not to abide by their hospitality. So , we all ended up walking with a headache from the sugar-rush and stomach ache too. Thank god none of us ended up with typhoid fever (Malay-demam kepialu). My foster family, once they learnt of my fondness towards durian, bought me durian EVERYDAY! Good gracious, I can't even eat more than 5 ulas of durian Thailand, god forbid durian kampung! Could only muster 2 ulas. If I eat more, I would end up with fever and runny nose instantly!

(pic-makan sotong celup tepung tepi pantai Irama)

Well, anyway, the worst ordeal was the data processing part after we left the kampung. It was like HELL! We spent quite a few consecutive days and slept at 1-2 am everyday to do data entering, analysis and the powerpoint presentation. I don't find the need to elaborate more on this. Anyway, our community diagnosis were diabetes and hypertension - the usual combo. So, for the the second cfcs residency in three months time (right after our term holiday), we are going to focus our survey on this two. After that, in the 3rd and fourth residency next year, we have to do intervention and post intervention study. By that time, i'm pretty sure that the whole mukim would know all 18 of us by name! Just imagine, a few of the surveyed houses were of police inspectors. We had to obtain some info from the mukims police station. The thing was, it took 3 days for them to 'process' application for info. but, once they saw our faces, thay did the job in just 30 mins! Well, that's the scenario in Malaysia...

Anyway, I was nervous like hell during the presentation because the groups before us were bombarded with nasty questions and comments. A few groups had to re-do their presentation. If that happens to me, i would definitely break-down. God forbid!But anyway, all that didn't happen..We sailed through the presentation with just a few coments and remarks. That's all. Except that my hands were trembling like mad (evident by the not so static laser pointer that i used). Well, now, we have to prepare for the next residency plak.


Aduh...penat aku masuk kampung ni tak habis lagi, now I need to study for final exam next week! Banyak giler nak kene study!Tak taulah aku...Babai kengkawan sume!MISS YOU ALL LOADS AND LOADS!!!Take care!

Dattebayo!

It was 2 weeks ago when I was literally forced to watch this apparently popular anime by my housemate. Frankly I wasn’t in the mood to watch anything at all, I was too angry and upset with myself the way I did in the viva. After I saw my life just crumbled down into nothingness right before my eyes a second after I heard the first question in anatomy station, how could I have any interest in watching cartoon, any cartoon for that matter. But to my mate insistence he politely shuffled himself closer and closer to the dvd player. Pressed the open button and the cd tray slid out. He put on the homemade dvd and pressed the button to shut it. Then he switched the scart adaptor that connected to the dvd. He did this all rather slowly and without looking at me. He knew much to my dismay I wouldn’t get up from the ever so comfy couch of mine, he was so sure that I was too depressed to stop him. There he was clicking the AV button on the tv remote and that was it, I was hooked.

I know that this anime has been around for god knows how long. Never had any interest in it. I remember my younger brother at some points a few years ago was obsessed with it and this was all he kept talking about. He wanted me to take a peep at it but no way, was my answer. I felt like the show was a bit too childish. Then there were a few of my friends who would rather spend the weekends in front of the laptop catching up on the show, hmmm I guess that seemed a bit extreme. Little that I know I am no different to those guys, that I had underestimated them all and surely I underestimated the show too. I am officially a NARUTO fan, a big fan I may add.

I hate to admit it I caught the bug big time and way too late than others. Good for me that my housemate has all the episodes on CDs and that was what I’ve been doing the past week. Naruto episodes, one after another. I become obsessed with it and I swear I can now differentiate the different syllables in nihonggo. I know this might sound a bit too much but this show has so many levels, humors, drama, actions and some good values too. Determination, ambitions, persistence, passion to name a few. I guess I probably looked too much into it for a cartoon but that’s how I feel about it. It’s fun to watch and the stories are quite well told too. The suspense and thrills felt are as real as the non-animated movies. Gosh, how could I miss this?!

Some people find the main character is a bit too annoying while I on the other hand find him very adorable. Naruto is a cute lovable kid, reminds me of my youngest brother. The enthusiasm, the mischief and the energy that he has. What he lacks in knowledges he compensates it in courage and his spirit. Starting out as a lone orphan he made a beautiful and meaningful life his way out of nothing. Never gives up, very strong person indeed. Very inspiring. Anyway I guess that’s enough for my elaborate thought on this anime. The new naruto shipudeen is out and can’t wait for it. I’m anxious on how the story will turn out. gosh never thought I would say that. By the way as the day get closer, I can’t wait that finally I’m coming home............

DATTEBAYO!!!!!

It's been a while...

Tup,tap,tup,tap...it's been 9 months since I left Cork for good June 2006. Could barely remember the smell of Cork...my hometown. Really felt bad 4 it.

As u guys know, i'm not really the couldn't-stop-rambling kind of guy. Am really wrecking my brain tryin' to spill out some ideas here!

Allright, firstly, HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAS IRFAN JAYA MAHAMOOTH! Really wish that i could do something 4 ur b'day...at least bake u a cake. U must be torturing urself like hell this year huh? I wonder...

Last night, ema told me Seri's coming back to M'sia next week? REALLY?? Hey, Seri, if ur comin' to Kota Bharu, let me know ok? i'm not on holiday yet, so, i'll just pray that u'll be comin'...nak tgk afiq dan nattie! Kita kuar gi 'make-make deh' (loghat kelate).

Heeheee!!Paan, is it true? Ur comin' back 28th March? My holiday would be exactly one month after that. We must make plans to meet up then..Me , ema and you. Maybe leia would b here too? We’ll make a small reunion. We’ll let Ema drive us in her Vios, hehe…she’s the expert now, tak sesat punye,heeheee…tapi kalau dia ngan aku je sesat gak, heeeheeee!!habis satu KL kami pusing!! Hey, Ema, I’ll visit u in Bentong ok during my holiday..U must make some cekodok pisang and coffee too. Maybe karipap pusing too. Maybe I can bake a cake with ur mum too, hehe…tambah berkenan nanti mak kau kat aku..dahla hensem, pandai masak plak tu!Wahaahaa!!

Gonna change to topic now. About my recent adventure. I went jungle-trekking before Chinese new year break. It was awesome. I bet Honza would love the adventure. It was a 16 miles trek. (eh betul ke eja trek ni! Ke track? Wuteva la..). we went in small groups. The scenery was quite breath taking! I was feeling quite nervous at first of the possible encounter with cold blooded reptilians especially snakes and crocs! Not to mention, leeches and pacats! Eeuuuu! Scary man! Fortunately, did not witness a single one. I was attacked by a swarm of tree ants though. It was quite horrible. Sting here and there!At that time, we were climbing a hill ( it was more than 45 degree steep!) and I stopped to snap a pic. Got attacked while POSING MAUT gitu! Haha!! Aiyooo, the hill was quite scary, dark and scary! Well, we went through sawah padi yang banyak gilerr all the way. There’s also its rival, the famous tobacco plantations of Kelantan! Can be seen anywhere and everywhere! It looked like spinach only larger. Did manage to snap one leaf and stick it in my pocket. It ended up dark, damp and wilted later on after being soaked in the swamp ( which is the best part and the most gruesome part of the journey!). Then we passed by a fishermen’s village. It stink of fish (well, what do you expect?) It’s not at all like what I expected, they did quite well for themselves. Well, to tell u the truth, these Kelantanese people…many of them are quite rich folks. Hidden in the jungle…in small villages..by the river…HUGE MANSIONS!! These people own hectares of plantation fields, dozens of lorries and tractors. I learnt that fact especially during my communities and family case studies programmes in Pasir Puteh.

Oh yeah, back to the journey…the last part was the SWAMP! I followed the last group, so by the time we reached the swamp, it was already pass noon and the tide was already up to my chest! Can you amagine my horror? Man..i’m not made up for that kind of thing! Air paya tu berselut hitam! Couldn’t discern a thing in there! God knows the creatures lurking underneath!Tak nak aku fakir! Well, believe it or not, I was really caught in the moment, wasn’t really thinking of all those things. Just jumped in and dragged my feet. Maybe I was too tired and just wanted the ordeal to be over with.

Done with the jungle trekking. Anyway, it was a great weekend spent. Actually, it was a camping weekend organized by ‘us’ second year’s who’s involved with ‘BigSib’ or big sibling. It’s under Ko-k and is compulsory for second year’s. we get to choose between BigSib, Askar Wataniah and Jabatan Pertahanan Awam JPA 3. Well, could you ever picture me joining the Askar Wataniah or JPA3? Just not me! Haha!Anyway, they also get to do awesome things like learning to use the firearm and being thrown in an island and left there to survive! I like the adventure part, I just don’t want to participate in the kawad! That’s just a NO, NO! oh yeah, the camping, well, only first year boys had to sleep in the tent, the girls in dorms. Since boys BigSib were so scarce, we got the chalets! With air-conditioning and nice bathrooms! Just so u know, my real friends are all first years. Berbulu je diorang tgk aku duduk chalet! Oh yeah, one more thing. Can u believe that they gave me the most unreasonable (if only they knew) position of all? Exco kerohanian dan kebajikan! Good god! Well, I did my job anyway. Woke up from my nice and cool snooze at 4.30 a.m to wake everybody up for subuh prayer( it was just a snooze that I could afford for the whole weekend). I did used the haler (cerobong pembesar suara tu). Eeeiii…gelak besar aku dalam hati. Macam tak percaya aku bleh buat keje cam tu!! Well, keje kebajikan tu okla, make sure everybody ate and healthy. Oh yeah, make sure there’s water supply! Aiyoo…there wasn’t water supply for those poor kids on the second day! My job anyway was simple, just inform and make sure the management fix the problem. Nothing I couldn’t handle.

Dahla, tu my fingers are tired already. Am feeling the hunger pang now. Gonna go and buy nasi for dinner. Adios amigos..astalavista babeess!

what a change a year make

this would be my first entry for this year, 2007 and it's february already. time flies, really quickly and i find it hard to catch up sometimes. yesterday i was on the phone to my parents when i found out that yesterday was thursday instead of wednesday which i thought it was all day long. i felt like i lost a day and as the big day approaching fast every morning i wake up with palpitation. it isn't an exaggeration i swear to god.

so for the past few weeks i have been a nocturnal creature. i didn't know how it happen and how it started but no matter what my eyes are wide awake at 3 am every morning and usually the lids begin to feel heavier at 6 am and maybe at 7 i would be sailing in deep REM sleep. tonight wasn't an exception and since my brain couldn't stand at the sight of Henderson-Hasselbach equation for acid base balance i figured why not, lets do something with this dying site. that's the thing, i'm beginning to think that aging actually started to take its toll on me. it was so frustrating that it takes longer for me to understand stuff i've learnt before not too distant past ago and even then to retain new memories which was like a second nature to me when i was young-er feel like such an effort and that isn't guaranteed to stick in my tiny brain a few hours later. what's up with that! i know this might sound a bit bad but i hope my friends out there especially those who were part of this blog share the same predicament, don't wanna be the odd one out, hahahahaha. it's not a "bit" bad, that actually is terrible and appaling. can't believe i said that.

the other day i was just thinking this time last year, i spent most of time in Cork. those good old days. chilling out just having fun with those crowd. i did enjoy it very much. but today it is a complete reversal of situation. it is completely different and empty. as most of the guys over there scattered all over the world now finding their ways in life. things are not like it used to be. i know that we shouldn't dwell in the past but you can't help missing those moments. where laughter were the essence of our congregation, in the expense of a few of our friends' miseries of course and they liked it anyway. i'm kidding. you know what i mean. if you ask everyone or yourself i'm sure there are no happy days like it was before, sure there are plenty happier days but somehow not quite like they were used to be. maybe i'm the only one who feel this way coz admittedly my life here sucks and god knows how desperately i wish i was home right now.

hmmm nothing on tv at this hour, no new news on the news channels, there were teleshopping shows in most of music and cartoon channels. never thought having full sky package with more than 100 channels can feel like a waste. the most annoying thing is i still don't feel sleepy!!! god maybe i should try some temazepam or something.

bored to death

its 830pm, my butt/bontot/boings/posteria/gluts super compressed that i'm convinced that it will never gain it natural elastisity anymore, the thought of my butt loosing its perky-ness over vaginal issues really gave me a fright, took hold of the car keys, and drove straight to the place i know most ( other than 32 riverview, rumah Sri,CUH Kafe) TESCOs. (tak tgk kiri kanan dah)

I guess strolling down the each and every aisle is soooooooo therapeutic.....met a few junior malays, gave them the "ohhh-aku final med-to busy to know-u" look, in which i think they replied my gesture by giving me the "ohhh-tuh budak perasan doctor-sbb dia kawan dgn doctor je-padahal baru student je"look - padan muka aku.

Now back with a bunch of chocolate BAGS, i dont know wat to blog about ...... hilang akal orang kata.

i guess i'll leave for now, nanti aku blog lagi lepas abes exam pasal puhkee nie......

Xmas 2006

as usual, i come here to bitch. even i got nothing to bitch about nevertheless i just feel like it especially now. well it's christmas today and the whole country pretty much like a scene of town you see in silent hill movie, quiet, dull and lifeless. i guess everyone is at home, savouring alcoholic drinks and enjoying the foods with the company of their families regardless those they love or not. i suppose on this kinda day you just be together put aside what the feelings they have toward each other. feud and disagreement are totally whole different stories and christmas is here to be enjoyed not spoiled. pretty much like hari raya. sound fun. where am i while all this fun going on? home and alone. well i chose to stay at home this weekend although i did say i would go out somewhere and do something to make the most of my day off but when i got home last friday night somehow there was some invisible force like magnetic field that kept me grounded in my house.


god how i love to be home at last. my own room, my own space, my own bed and my own coffee machine. i missed them i know it's kinda sad just to say that and make it sound like those are real living people but reality are those just inanimate objects instead. nevertheless i guess that the fact i have been away for sometimes made me realize how i treasure the luxury of having my own comfort zone. hell i can walk around naked if i wanted too. i woke up late on saturday and it's nice to wake up without alarm clock screaming in your ear at 6 o'clock like it was this past 2 weeks. lay on my bed still covered by the duvet up to my neck thinking when should i get up and leave this warm little atmosphere inside the sheet. i kept lying tossing and turning on the wide double bed enjoying what i've been missing all the while smiling to the comfort i felt. argh, i can do this all day. unfortunately my empty stomach started to yell the churning sound demanding to be stuffed. and the timing couldn't get any better when siti texted inviting me over to her place as she just finished cooking nasi lemak. nasi lemak!! wo, i love my bed and sleep but no way i was going to pass that. i love nasi lemak and my mouth just flooded with my spit as i typed this. i got up and finally made it to siti's a little over two hours later. well i had to make a cup of coffee for myself after getting up which is a daily ritual for me and as i was ready to have my shower i found out that the boiler was indeed turned off so i had to wait for almost 30 minutes for the water to be at perfect temperature for me to shower, don't ask i am that anal. that's why it took a bit longer for me to get to siti's besides town was mad and packed with people who were doing their last minute shopping and that doubled the length of time needed to me to get to siti's . anyway i made it and fullamak the nasi lemak was awesome! loved it, loved it and loved it! way to go siti! we talked and hung out over a couple rounds of coffee which i bought from insomnia. great coffee i must say. we saw a movie "brick" i rented from extravision, it was okay, kinda slow but the story is good. about drugs and teenagers and all the troubles they caused. how did they manage to go through high school with these kinda problems are beyond me, if indeed they happen but then again i'm not surprised if they did happen. at that age i was still struggling with the academics without all these extracurricular stuff. frankly didn't have time to think about it all, well i was a nerd, maybe it happened but i was too oblivious to even notice it. i went home a little after 12 because i was so sleepy and tired for some reasons even though i was still in bed less than 10 hours before that. guess the residual exhaustion from the previous weeks started to catch up on me. i went straight to bed and slept like a baby as soon as i lay my head on the pillow.


nothing much on sunday. meant to go to cork but i was too lazy to leave the house besides i woke up late again and the day almost over so i decided to just chill out at home tidy my place. then comes today and the whole day i've been dreading for these coming week. i'll be working tomorrow and on call then another call on friday then on sunday the 31st, supposedly the busiest day for business in my field. thank god i'm finishing in the morning of january 1st and god knows how impatient i am now to get there. can hardly wait! urghhhh i hate this moment and i hate this week already. hope tomorrow will be easy and so will the next day and the next day till sunday. wishful thinking!

hmm......(sigh)

I started to get used to getting around this place. Although it only has been less than a week I have to be extremely quick at adapting to what’s going on around me. I guess that’s the only way for me to survive this mediocre existence. Living out of a suitcase like this frankly is a very exhausting life and even more depressing. Oh god! You have no idea how miserable my life is right now. Completely alone in a place that is alien to me with none of the faces you meet seem remotely familiar. To make matter worse the job that I’m doing right now is not something that I fond of, in fact the one I’d wished I didn’t get at all. I remember last Tuesday when I got the text about the job, I was thinking sure I can just answer perhaps they wouldn’t even pick me all the while hoping that other people might answer to the advertisement and got chosen. After I hung up with the agency it occurred to me what am I gonna do if they do want me to fill in the job? Shit! I shouldn’t have called them in the first place to tell them I was interested. A few hours later my cell rang and medical admin office was on the other end of the line. Damn! Damn! Damn! I had to honour my words, told them I was going to come then there was nothing to be said but to pack my stuff. In about 2 hours after the call I received I was on the road dreading about the next few weeks ahead of me and keep wishing I hadn’t pick up my phone and answer that ad. I don’t like to think of myself as a stupid person but most of the time you have no idea what a complete idiot I am, really! Got my life to prove it. Anyway a week has gone and 2 more weeks left with 4 on-calls waiting in line. I just have to ignore inner cry and suffering and just look up to the finishing line. Thank god I will be off for Christmas and god knows how I’m going to make most of it!

Untitled

Yeah they share the same alpha globulin but deferred in their beta globulin… huh? … You know the Thyroid Stimulating Hormone (TSH) and the Beta HCG… so?... well severe hypothyroidism can cause excessive emesis… so?.... in sudden surge of BHCG it can mimic that effect, causing hyperemesis . So the chosen 1% of BHCG positive (ie pregnant woman) can experience the excessive nausea and vomiting from the surge of this hormone until it plateau around (and I mean around the clock!) after first trimester (yeah right!!!!), or 14 weeks, or 18 weeks, OR the whole 40 weeks of pregnancy (wuuhoooo just the thing I wanna know!)

This is my ever so scarce literature contribution in this space. But I actually do have a lot to tell. Im sure most of you knew, that I was ‘out-of-commission’ for 7 weeks. Half of that time spent in front of either a sink or a toilet bowl throwing my empty guts out. Ohh yes, and include a full week hours being admitted as a patient in my place of work. Hugely embarrassing! Now all my colleagues, from the consultants to the porters and security guys are in the know. Well it turns out kinda sweet coz I notice people are gallantly nicer at work (including the midwives hehehe).

Alhamdulillah menjelang hari raya, aku beransur pulih ( sikit jer) tapi bulehlah dgn pertolongan Mas Irfan Jaya (pelajar tahun akhir di Cork) aku buat ketupat palas (thank you ibu/ayah), lodeh and kemas2 rumah. Nasiblah kawan2 aku yang baik hati semuanya buat pot luck datang rumah aku ( Sri buat kuah kacang yang kemudian aku spoilkan, sorrylah Sri, betul2 tak sengaja, Ajee/K toh buat rendang, Lia/Zarrie Anne/Wawa buat meehoon utk 50 org agaknya). Kira Aidilfitri 2006 aku bestlah juga walaupun dah start kerja balik. Taklah sedih sgt cam Paan, tapi aku dah puas sedih kot sebelum tu heheheheh.

The next weekend, I went to Limerick (takut juga ada projectile event dlm kereta, tapi alhamdulillah ok besides a few very dodgy moments). Hmm, I would really like to announce, aku first time main pool (kat rumah Fahd) and guess what? Aku menang! Tak percaya aku, takpalah pada sapa2 yg tak puas hati tu, nanti kita re-match ya! Excited aku pada suatu hari minggu yang indah tu, aku terjumpa sayur kangkung kat Asia Market Limerick! Ohhh bestnyer… terasa nak makan nasi lemak dgn sayur kangkung. Paan pun melayan aku pergi bershopping (sebab Paan pun dah lama tak makan nasi). Bertuah aku ngan Mosh dapat makan kat rumah Paan sambil tgk citer Mistress of Spice…..layann

I really want to use this space to thank Aji/Kak Toh/Uncle/SriAbe/Lia/Zarrie Anne/Ee/Ariri for all the cooking you guys did for me and Mosh during those trying times. Tak taulah aku nak makan apa kalau korang takda. Paan, Ema, Shaz and Mas… thank you for your supportive msgs and tolong2 aku. Im on the mend right now Alhamdulillah. Hopefully I’ll regain my appetite fully to regain the 7 kgs I lost (even in my crunchest diet I didn’t achieve that! Errrr aku pernah ke diet? Anyway…). AND of course to dearest Mosh, thank you for all the cooking, then holding my hair afterwards while my stomach rejected it, and for fixing a hot drink, for semi-forcing me to Erinville and generally being patient and supportive through the ordeal. #

Eid 2006……

Monday 23/10/06 0330hrs

“ala canggung, ala canggung la la la le la le” that was the alarm went off from my mobile phone that woke me up from my deep sleep. Urghhh! At this hour I would give up everything I’ve own just to keep myself in bed. I had to get up though, in 4 hours I had to be in Navan. I was cursing myself while heading towards the shower, thank god that I packed everything last night before going to bed. Got ready and had a bowl of crunchy nut cereal and a cup of coffee I finally made my way out to the car. I had a small thermos mug filled with Guatemalan Antigua coffee which beans I bought from starbuck’s at Cork airport a few days before ramadhan. This particular coffee behaves like a stimulant drug to me, I get all hyper and jittery which means in my case I get manic when I drink it, just what I need to keep me awake throughout the trip, gotta drink it before fasting starts though. I left my house at 0500 hrs, thinking hmm 3 hours that should be enough to get to the destination on time.

Monday 23/10/06 0630hrs

Traffic was pretty much bumper to bumper on this Naas-Dublin motorway at this hour. “ what the hell is going on?! It almost 7 o’clock for god’s sake!” I stuck in traffic, the sun wasn’t even rise yet and at least 40 km away from Navan and that how far it was from M50 motorway after the tollbooth. I was maybe 5-6 km away from M50 at the time and hardly moved an inch in the last 10 minutes. I started to get a bit irritable. Anxious that I was going to be late and anxious that my car would go overheated. Yes my car had been a bit strange in this past months, meant to get it checked out but for unknown reasons I never did, hmmmm, well the thing is if I stop for maybe 10 minutes with the engine running, the temperature scale hand would soar up to the highest point you know the reddest part of the scale. The “STOP” sign will light up and keep blinking like mad that every single time it happens I swear I could see the bonnet explodes and my life starts flashing before my eyes. Talking about being dramatic. I got really restless at this point the temperature hand just about to reach the forbidden zone. I prayed and kept on praying, the last thing I need was my car stall in this traffic jam. My scrub smelled like coffee I spilled earlier. The lid of that stupid mug wasn’t securely fit and most of the hot coffee ended up on my lap instead of my mouth. Damn! I knew it at that moment the next 24 hours of my life gonna be hell.

God knew how relief I was when I crossed the tollbooth in one piece and sped up to N3 route to Navan. I looked at the clock it was 10 minutes to 8 am. I was already late.

Monday 23/10/06 0810hrs

I guess I was about 15 km away from Navan when the traffic came to a halt, again?! This road should be empty at this hour as very few people were suppose to go inbound to Navan, it should be the other way around. What a luck! Turned out that there was an accident up ahead, shit! That would definitely go to my hospital and I was the surgical on-call, basically that was for me and I better get my ass over there before them.

I got to the hospital a little after 8:30 and headed straight to the dayward, thank god I wasn’t the only one who was late. So I carried on working as usual.

Monday 23/10/06 1115 hrs

My bleep went off and it was casualty, great! It started already. Rule of thumb if you were on-call and casualty started ringing you before 12 pm, you might as well just move in to casualty as you basically looking at a very long day and night. I never wrong at this. So yeah that road traffic accident (RTA) I told you guys earlier made it to the hospital. Surprisingly she was okay, oh yes it was a young woman in the car by herself thankfully, just a broken wrist a couple of cuts and graze here and there. She was so lucky, so I thought. I examined her, something not quite right with her tummy, managed to get an urgent ultrasound. She went straight to CT from ultrasound room, my suspicious was confirmed that she had liver laceration with intraperitoneal bleeding but she was stable. I knew it we had to transfer her to a bigger and better hospital with liver unit and I had to go with her. At that stage I had 3 people admitted already and time just turned 3 pm. It was a terrible day in general, the weather sucked and medical team had 3 heart attacks already when I got to A&E and again it wasn’t even 12 pm.

Monday 23/10/06 1900 hrs

After a quick drink and snack for fast breaking, I jumped on the back of the ambulance with the liver lady. We’re heading for a hospital in Dublin. It was quite a long ride considering all the sirens and the lights were on, we managed to get there despite a little lost along the way as none of the accompanying people been to this part of the hospital ironically and transferred the patient in one piece, phew! What a relief. We headed back to Navan. I hate ambulance ride, anti-emetic I took right before we left worked wonder otherwise I would be on the stretcher instead of the patient. We got back at about almost 11 pm. Went up to the wards did some jobs and finally lay down on the bed at about 1 am, only then I just realized it was eid.

I recited takbir, the touching and moving malaysian’s way of reciting takbir, not aloud just to myself, at that particular time I wish I was at home. I know I told some of my friends before that I didn’t really feel anything or anxious at all for the eid but at that moment how I wish I was with someone or some people at least I’m close to if it weren’t my family. Okay in another word I feel a bit lonely and kinda sad. Then I spent the whole night okay not the whole night but most of the night replying text messaging to everyone particularly those in Malaysia. I called my parents and god, it was good to hear their voices. I felt much better, much and much better!

Tuesday 24/10/06 0400hrs

I came down to casualty again, a couple more patients to see, I probably was asleep for about 30 minutes when the bleep went off, damn you bleep! As I was talking to one of the patients, my phone rang and it was my brother in his cheerful and happy voice wishing happy eid, actually he needed my grandmother’s house phone number, that cheeky lad. Luckily I was awake what if I was asleep? Sure I would get really cranky and give out to him regardless it was raya or not, the thing is I could never bring myself to that angry, cranky person and my brothers and sisters know it, that’s why it has been going on for as long as I’ve been here and will keep on happening I tell you, not that I never mention to them, they just don’t care I guess. I love them very much and that gives me the strength to put up with them.

Tuesday 24/10/06 0730hrs

I got up after a little snooze, I felt a little fresh and went to the shower. Prayed fajr and about 8 am I did my own eid prayer, I know I wouldn’t get a chance to do it as we had theatre today. It was such a long day and I was dying to get out of here, not that I got somewhere else to be but I just wanted to go to sleep. I left at last at 6:30 that evening, after a ward round that I came along half-heartedly. Checked in at the B&B and the rest the of the evening was a blur to me. Next thing I knew I woke up in my work clothes in the middle of the night and when I looked at my watch it was 3 am Wednesday morning. I went back to bed and just before that I wish myself “Selamat Hari Raya!”

the day has gotten gloomy........

I can’t believe it has been a week already since we started ramadhan, it made no difference to me except there are more invitations to breaking fast party in the weekends, may it be here my lovely hometown or Cork. Soon Eid will be around the corner and while people back home will be busy rushing and busting their asses off getting ready for the celebration I on the other hand will be chilling on my couch oblivious to the date which Eid will be fell on, coz I know someone will let me know the second it’s decided and bless those people who invented mobile technology, phone or internet alike.

It definitely feels different when you are away for this sort of things. Last year, I went home after 4 years been away for this holiday season. I think I did blog about my disappointment after the Eid, how all my hyped up expectation just crumbled down like the twin towers after the plane crashed into them. Sadly to say I still feel a bit bitter over it, I know, I know it’s time to let go unfortunately letting go is one thing I find very, very difficult to do. One of my flaws I’m afraid as some might notice. At least I don’t feel angry anymore that’s a good sign. Since then I feel like totally numb over this whole festive holidays. I just don’t look forward to it, think or feel anything at all about it basically I just don’t care. It’s going to be the same as any other day like February 5th or August 17th. Am I worried about this? I’m afraid not either. Oh well there’ll be plenty other things coming our ways after this that I might be a little more enthusiastic I suppose.

Last weekend, I came to Cork for E/Ariri and Leia/Honza/Zariena/Wawa’s hosted breaking fast feast on Saturday and Sunday respectively. Boy o boy, I was like a starved vulture hogging on freshly dead horse. I kept on eating and eating and eating until my stomach was stretched to its maximum capacity when at this stage anymore eaten food couldn’t possibly stay down but to go up instead the way it comes, eugh! That is disgusting I didn’t do that though, I stopped when I started to feel that breathing suddenly became a conscious effort. Hahaha I ate that much! Who am I to deny my own appetite, thank god I’m such a terrible cook and the most slothful on top of that when it comes to cooking. Otherwise I might be the heaviest and most obese guy ever, probably on a waiting list for gastric bypass at this stage. Anyway, thank you guys for the tasty, most delicious and mouth watering malay foods I’ve sampled for a while. It was f#*king awesome you had no idea how happy and grateful I was hahahaa. I still can’t stop thinking that I turned down Sri’s invitation for Nasi Lemak during the week. What can I do? I already had a plan on the day wish that I hadn’t. Well sure she could find deep in her big and kind heart to do this some other time but this one I would definitely be securing a seat for myself. I really had great time and nice to see these people again. Nothing much changed that I noticed except that Afiq, Akeelah and the B, Nattie and E’s belly grown bigger. Swear to god, I can’t believe that E is that big! Can’t imagine how CT will look like a few months from now.

Yes another surprise birthday party this weekend and this time it was Agee’s. Credit to Abe for distracting her with all the facts and trivias of Star Wars : revenge of the Sith, hahahahaha. Well it worked and she seemed clueless and surprised when everyone was standing in front of her with a cake and lit candles on. She didn’t see that coming thinking that Aqilah was doing something funny in the next room I ought to show her and right then when she got at the door everyone yelled “surprise” and singing the birthday anthem. It was fun. The blackforest cake was devine I must say and Sri you simply got better and better at this. I don’t like cakes that much but this one was an exception.


So there it was my weekend, I wonder how those guys in Malaysia getting on? Sure they are at better place than I am and I’m not talking just about the weather here. Yeah winter’s here now, there is no such thing as fall season in this place regrettably to say. The day’s getting colder, shorter (good for the fasting), gloomier, more wet and more depressing than ever (hang on to your cipramil people!) hope everything goes well for you guys and sure is great to hear from you soon. To everyone if it’s not too late still I wish you happy fasting and hopefully not too early to wish you selamat hari raya!

weekend

nak ucapkan THANX to Sri sbb anta aku gi train station Jumaat lepas, berjaya jugak aku naik train tu, thanks to kehebatan Sri bawak kete. Thanx jugak kat abei n sri sbb amik aku semalam, hehe...terasa cam korang ni parents aku lak waktu sekolah2 dulu.
Dublin, hmm...ntah le kenapa aku tak berkenan sgt kat city ni. It's ugly (what's with all these red brick buildings? they're horrendous),dirty, busy and the street layouts are just plain weird (once u get in u can never get out).
Tapi disebabkan husband aku ada kat sana terpaksa la aku rajin2 naik train ke Dublin. Not to mention that i will be living there come January! argh, but hopefully we will find a place in Dun Laoghaire, a breath of fresh air from all the city madness. It's situated abt 45 minutes outside Dublin City, in the eastcoast, and it's lovely. apartment2 dia , the beachfront ones, fuh! lawa2..i can't imagine how expensive the rents are. but it'd be nice if we get any place there, coz i can just imagine u guys coming over for some weekend, picnic2 kat tepi laot...emmm bestnya!!! hehe
oh ya, nak recommend citer Children of Men kat sapa2 yg blom tgk. It's really, really good.